Sandy McIntosh

Charley and Jane were fooling around, and one day Jane told Charley she was
pregnant. “You’ll marry me, of course.”

He thought about it. “On one condition: You have to lose thirty pounds. Then
I’ll marry you.” Charley didn’t want to be seen with some drooping petunia.

Charley was an accountant and Jane a Poli-Sci major, prim and proper. They
moved in together and had the baby. “Now you must begin your diet,”
commanded Charley.

Some days all she had was a cup of tea. Others, she stared at an empty cup.
Eventually, the weight came off. Charley was amazed; Jane had become a
beautiful, sexy woman.

Other men noticed. A strip club owner offered an enormous sum if she’d dance
for his customers.

Jane danced and lost more weight. The men at the club went wild when she
shimmied down the fire pole in the middle of the stage.

Charley was jealous. He wanted this beautiful woman for himself. “I’ll marry
you now,” he declared. “Let’s go tie the knot!”

“Screw you, Charley,” Jane answered. “I don’t want to be seen with some
boring accountant.

Charley came home to find Jane in their bed with the strip club owner..

Charley drove away angry, bitter. He’d done so much for her, he reminded
himself. Got her to lose all that weight, after all.

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